Latest Dodgers’ Rumors Not Just Crazy, But Scary

The last couple of days have seen rampant rumors of deals involving the Dodgers and West Division rivals Arizona Diamondbacks and San Diego Padres that defy logic, decay brain cells, and horrify any true fan. If there is any truth to either of these deals, then the one has to ask, “What is Andrew Friedman thinking?”

The first involves Andre Either and the D’Backs, who have now returned to the world of real major league baseball after firing former general manager and all-around incompetent, and borderline sociopath, Kevin Towers, replacing him with a real baseball man, Tony La Russa, who could be taking the Dodgers for a ride as he seeks to rid the franchise of another of its evildoers, catcher Miguel Montero. Montero was one of the

principal instigators and major participants in the vile brawls between the Dodgers and D'Backs that resulted in serious injuries and vastly insufficient suspensions for the intentional and life-threatening head-hunting, begun by the encouragement of Towers, the fastballs to the head thrown by former D'Back ian kennedy, and the encouragement of Montero, who just seems to always be catching when these things break out.
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Now, La Russa wants to send Montero to the Dodgers. Bull crap. While Ethier is one of the two outfielders who should be on the trading block, bringing Montero to the Dodgers in exchange would be a mistake of monumental proportions. His shady, deceitful and reckless character apart, he also is step down defensively from incumbent A.J. Ellis, and offensively, his best years are no better than Ellis’ best. Ellis is coming off his worst year as the Dodgers’ regular catcher, but prior to 2014, his yearly stats were right there with Montero, who is also coming off his two worst seasons since his rookie year.

It had looked like this deal was dead in the water, but late Monday, La Russa indicated that talks with the Dodgers are still in progress.

An even worse state of affairs could be developing with the Padres, as the story there is that the Dodgers would trade Matt Kemp, a major mistake under any circumstances, in a possible deal that as far as value for value is concerned, is far worse than the Arizona rumor. Here, the rejuvenated Kemp, once again a likely cornerstone of the Dodgers lineup, would be dispatched to the south for San Diego’s incumbent catcher, Yasmani Grandal, who is younger than either Ellis or Montero, but who bears scant resemblance to a major league hitter, coming off consecutive years batting .216 and .225, and who in 2012 was suspended 50 games for illegal PED use.

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Jeff Sanders, writing for the San Diego Union Tribune, says the Padres should basically back the truck up to Dodgers' Stadium and give LA whatever it wants for Kemp, even agreeing to pay his full remaining salary - $105 Million - with no contribution from the Dodgers. But, a headline on last Friday, had it correct: "In what world do the Dodgers actually trade Matt Kemp?"

Andrew, go home! Leave the Winter Meetings, and return to LA, with Kemp still a member of the Dodgers, and with no one named Montero or Grandal in tow. You’re new here, but we thought you were a quick study. So far, what you have done has been so-so, and if either of these rumors comes true, the, well, you might want to re-assess the Florida real estate market.

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